life doesn't stop...

Life. It starts so innocent, so free. The life of a child is truly a splendor that many cannot savor, because a child lives 'in the moment,' it seizes the day for all that the phrase is worth. Childhood is hell for some and unparalled bliss for others. As teenagers, we feel the stress of living up to our parents expectations, the rebuttle of proving to everyone (especially our parents) that we are our own person. This is the time of identification. As a teen, we live, love, and lose like no tomorrow because its better to truly live and love and lose than to not live or love at all. The impressions we leave upon our lives lasts a lifetime at this point, good or bad. Then college, the best years of our lives. We are free from responsibility and start making a name for ourselves away from home. We spend countless hours studying, countless hours doing mindless, useless things, and countless hours investing in the lives of our friends - those who truly care about you. And then what....?

Tired. "Real life." Character. These are a few things that strike me at this point in my life. I'm tired, and not because i don't get enough sleep...it is simply a lifestyle of working, school, living, loving, and giving of myself. There are no more days of sleeping all day, of being irresponsible because I can. This is real life. It does not stop. Time still ticks and the sun rises and sets and I can't stop it. Well then...well played I say.

My realization is that I have to take time to stop. I do not mean run away from the business and find a "quiet place," this is a lie in my opinion that I have tried to convince myself as truth. Stress doesn't care about me it just loves to live inside my head. What I can do is make good use of my time...intentionally rest, intentionally study, intentionally study, intentionally love, and in turn will find that life is not stopping so I need to start living life to the fullest. Does stress care that I go on dates with my wife? Do class deadlines care that I work full time? Am I passive in living my own life? To answer the latter, I am determined to say no no matter how hard the undertow of life pulls me to the point where I'm so concerned about "getting through" life rather than "living life to the fullest." By grace I can be true to the words I have just written. I know you feel the same too, because life doesn't care who you are...but we determine who we are, and that is what defines our character.